“I feel …”

I spent the first two years of Henry’s life, the worst being the first, worrying about his stomach, his esophagus and yes, his poop. Welcome to the world of reflux and food allergies. Lovely.

I remember when he was a newborn, arching, and screaming and I just knew he was in pain. The pediatricians threw around terms like colic, gassy, fussy…topped off by, ‘hey get a babysitter and take a walk around the block so you don’t have to hear the crying and screaming for awhile”. Yeah, I don’t think so. This is when I first learned, the hard way, that doctors don’t know everything, that you have to trust your mommy gut…and that you have to advocate for your child for them to get the care they need. These were hard months and I questioned myself often and thought to myself, gee, wouldn’t it be nice if he could just tell me what was wrong. Is he gassy or is he really hurting? Does he feel sick or his he just tired?

Of course I knew I had to wait until he learned to talk and expected this would happen in a typical time frame. Then in time I realized he wasn’t talking and I had bigger issues on my hands. All mommies come to know their child in such a way that you can almost read their mind and feel their pain when they do. On the other hand, a little verbal confirmation about what is happening is always nice.

So last week when I was in the kitchen making lunch and Henry came to me and said, “Henee fwow up” (Henry throw up)..and “bucket”, I was in shock and delighted all that the same time! Yes, he was about to hurl all over my kitchen floor and my poor baby wasn’t feeling good… but he told me how he was feeling and he had the words to do that! It was nothing short of amazing! These are the things I don’t take for granted and I’m sure I wouldn’t full appreciate if he didn’t have apraxia. I’m grateful for that. So go Henry!!

ps… he threw up once and was totally fine afterwards, so I feel ok celebrating just a little bit… :D


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